ubat hati

“ Ubat hati, ada lima perkara..
Yang pertama, baca Quran dan maknanya..
Yang kedua, solat malam dirikanlah..
Yang ketiga, duduk bersama orang soleh..”

Terdengar nasyid dari negara seberang ini dalam radio IKIM.fm masa tengah bawa kereta perjalanan balik ke rumah di Puchong. Terasa sangat Tuhan kasihkan aku. Saat-saat jiwa lalai, diingatkan aku kembali.

Masih ingat lagi, ayah bagi tafsir Quran sehari sebelum aku mendaftar di sekolah SMAPL 12 tahun dulu..( waah…terasa tuanya aku skrg..).
Dan Quran ini lah yang aku kilik ke matriks, ke universiti sehingga ke tempat aku bekerja skrg. Dari kulitnya baru berkilat, sehingga koyak dan terpaksa dibalut. Tetap yang ini.

Tafsir Quran yang menjadi tempat aku memfasihkan bacaan ayat Tuhan. Kalam yang aku dakap dan hadap sejak sekolah hingga sekarang. Teringat kata-kata seorg kawan masa kat universiti dulu..” hadiah terbaik yang kita boleh bagi seseorang adalah al-Quran. Selagi orang itu membacanya, selagi itulah pahalanya mengalir pada kita..”.

Kitab yang menjadi buku cerita terhebat. Kisah manusia, Penciptaan alam semesta. Hukum dalam Islam, tatakrama kehidupan. Kedahsyatan hari kiamat diceritakan dalam surah an-Naba’, at-Takwiir, al-Infithaar, al-Insyiqaaq. Surah al-Waaqiah tentang pembahagian manusia kepada 3 golongan. Surah Al-Fajr dan al-Qiyaamah. Sambil mulut membaca ayat, selang-selikan dengan membaca tafsir ayatnya, aqar dapat lebih menghayati apa yang kita baca.

Dan kadang-kadang tu, bila hati rasa tidak tenang, rasa resah gelisah memikirkan segala macam masalah manusia, masa tengah baca dan belek tafsir, mata akan terpandang beberapa baris maksud ayat. Seolah-olah diberi penawar kepada rasa gelisah, yang menjawab persoalan2 dalam kepala. Betapalah pertolongan Tuhan itu datang di saat kita amat memerlukannya. Dan sekali lagi akan terasa, betapa Allah Maha Pengasih Maha Penyayang. Selangkah kita mencarinya, seribu langkah Dia datang.

Semoga sama-sama kita memanfaatkan Ramadhan, agar tidak rugi dan menyesal melepaskan peluang yg hanya datang sekali dlm setahun. Sebulan untuk tarbiyyah diri yg 'lalai'. Bulan mendidik hawa nafsu dan mensucikan hati. Bulan keberkatan yg setiap saat di dalam bulan ini menjanjikan peluang keampunan dan rahmat yg berlipatganda. Tak tahu nasib kita tahun depan, masih berkesempatankah bertemu Ramadhan sekali lagi...

Doakan saya jugak ye..=]

p/s : ermm..tak boleh nak re-call ayat seterusnya dlm nasyid td, yg keempat dan kelima...anyone nak tolong ? =]

different

It’s always not easy when you are a lil bit different from people around you.

You will attract eyes to you when you wear a green top with bright pink skirt, when everyone else wear the ordinary, common colours.
You will draw attention when you choose to ride a bicycle to work when the rest of your colleagues drive big cars, leaving you behind with the dust fumes.
You will be considered weird if you bury your head in books, when the rest of your workmates sit around at one table gossiping.
You will be jeered as being too outspoken, if you stand up during meetings and give opinions about certain matters that you think is not right.
And you will be questioned continuously by people when you choose a different path from them.

You will be constantly the talk among people.
You are forever noticeable.
Because you choose to be different.

Put a deaf ear. Put a blind eye to them. Shut your mouth, grit your teeth and just do whatever you have put your mind into. As long as you’re not doing anything that’s against the law or religion, you are allowed to venture into whatever road you want albeit what the rest says.

It’s gonna be hard,..because you choose a path that no one else dare enough to go into. It’s hard because this path you’ve chosen is not a popular choice among people and you’ve got to start from scratch and work yourself up all by yourself. It’s hard to prove to yourself when people around doesn’t really understand and support. And sometimes, you cant help but silently question yourself during the down days..” did I make the right choice..?”

Don’t be discouraged by people’s doubt and questioning look. Don’t be disturbed by their ordinariness. Don’t be bothered by their negative remarks. When your heart are filled with a burning desire plus an unshakeable faith that this is what you want, by all means, do it. Because you will succeed.

There's nothing wrong choosing the left turn when the others turn right. In fact, it makes you stand out in the crowd of people. It makes you unique and special. It shows that you're brave and highly-determined to go amidst the risk, no matter how difficult or challenging the path is.

You choose to stand up for what you believe in. You choose to be the person you are today. You chose to be different when the rest prefers the safeness of their comfort zone. You keep going forward no matter what the others say in order to reach the dreams you’ve been wanting all your life.


Don’t stop now. Don’t change for other people’s sake. Don’t back-off until you have tried all means to achieving your dream.


Because you will succeed. InsyaAllah =]

'mencari cinta'

Aku bukan kayu
Meski kelihatannya kaku
Aku juga butuh cinta
Agar bisa hidup sempurna

Aku bukan tunggul
Yang sesuka hati aja kau senggul
Aku punya perasaan
Meski jarang benar aku lihatkan

Aku bukan patung boneka
Yang rela dijaja kepada sesiapa
Dibuat hiasan almari kaca
Sedang aku menangis meronta
Apa guna dipuja, diangkat derjat tinggi ke menara
Andai jiwaku
Kosong tak bernyawa
Tidak bahagia

Aku manusia biasa
Mungkin agak berbeda dari mereka
Jasad rohani tetap serupa
Biar falsafah hidup tidak sama
Matlamat akhir sealiran sekata
Mencari cinta dalam redha-Nya

Lantas ..
Izinkanku terbang
Benarkan ku bebas melayang
Dalam pengabdian hidup sebagai insan
Yang nafas diberi sekadar pinjaman
Entah esok, mungkin lusa..harus kupulangkan
Sebelum tiba ketikanya, sebelum suntuk masa,
Aku juga ingin bercinta.


- justme,2006

Be brave and confess !

Fear of rejection. That's what holding most people from admitting their feelings or confessing their heart. We fear being turned down. Fearing the word 'failure / loser' printed on our face after the rejection. Cursing ourselves later for being too bold, going on bended knees in front of tht person. And worry to risk the comfortable friendship that might be slightly awkward after the confession.


So much things to worry. So little time.


But if you don't tell the person now, would you one day, after 10 years, be wondering and asking to yourself questions like.." what if i had tell what i feel about her/him..?" ... and " what if she/he had said yes..?".


When i was in matriculation, there was this guy who works as a cook in the cafeteria. I know him as the guy who ties a piece of cloth over his head, smiling shyly each time i place my order. One day, i went to eat by myself, waiting for my usual order -nasi goreng pattaya- while watching tv. He came from the kitchen, holding in his hand my plate of rice and place it in front of me, which was a bit weird because usually we have to go and get the food ourselves. When i look down at my nasi goreng pattaya, it took quite a while for me to register the words scribbled with ketchup on it. It reads ' I love u' with 'love' written in the shape of heart. I sit looking straight at my plate, not sure how to react. Should i politely smile while cheerfully wave to him, saying sthg like " thank you,.....hehehehe!" ( which sound terribly stupid when i think of it now ). Or should i pretend not noticing the words and began hungrily crushing his work of art with fork and spoon? What i remember was thinking to myself as i eat..

" what a creative way to express one's feeling... "


The point here is, be brave and say it out. Honestly and humbly. Maybe the person would respond by saying sthg like.." thank you, but i like us better as friends..", at least you have tried. By keeping it inside while you still got the chance, what good will it do. You never know what you might be missing by letting the opportunity pass by without you trying to take action to it. And if your honest confession resulted with disappointment, at least in the eyes of that person hearing you sincerely pouring your heart content, her impression of you has changed. She will see you differently, silently admiring your act of bravery. (well,..it is one act of courage, how many of us dare enough to admit our feelings to the person we like upfront..?)

So..to everyone who's still very single, if your eyes and heart are set on someone, ( who is also single .. ;]), don't waste time hesitating. Get to know that person, pray hard to God may HE will lead and guide the way, and think positively..insyaAllah, if your intention is good, good things will come to you. And if that person prefer a 'friendship' instead of sthg more than that, it's okay..don't be discouraged, at least you have found one friend. And someone else is yet to be met...like the saying i read some time ago.." if you don't get what you want, just sit still and be patient, because God is thinking of something better for you.."

What that guy did sure was sweet, and that made him remembered till now. His readiness to be bold and confess, knowing there's a risk of rejection but he still did it anyway..

a friendly dental reminder =]

Whoever claims that dentist has the most perfect set of teeth,..i have to say tht i disagree with this statement. But if the sentence were changed a little to " dentist knows better how to take care of teeth, "..then maybe i would say yeap, because that's what we're here for. To be the one spreading the words about oral health and hygiene. Recalling a colleague's usual answer when asked about what she does for a living..-" .. i take care of ppl's teeth !" -=]

I dont have perfect set of teeth myself. Malocclusion, uneven teeth colour...u name it. In fact, i often joke with friends.." i have excellent set of teeth that can be used as exam's cases!". But i try my best to make sure it's clean. And it's not hard to achieve,.. you dont have to be a dentist to have squeaky, clean, a well-taken care of teeth. You just need some drive in yourself, to realise that having a clean, healthy oral condition is a MUST, and willing to kick lazy, filthy habits out into the bin.

Sometimes it's hard to pretend that i didnt notice the swollen gums of friends who's happily chatting and laughing in front of me, a sign of gum inflammation which usually caused by plaque. And i could see the accumulation of plaque ( when there's abundance of it,..) all around the gingival margins of front teeth, indicating lack of proper brushing ( or maybe not brushing at all..?). Seriously people, i can see all tht...( thanks to the 5 years training )

There's nothing wrong having crooked teeth, as long as it's clean. And I dont mind being asked by friends several questions about their teeth, as i'm more than willing to help. Obvious things like big cavities at the front teeth, terribly, terribly swollen gums not to mention the plaques around..just tells what kind of person you are. How can u look in the mirror, not noticing such obvious defect at your front teeth, unless you just couldnt bother to care about your own oral hygiene. Well..at least, think about your spouses, who have to endure and bear your not-so-good oral status each time they kiss you..=/

There are of course, treatment available. But most importantly, prevention is always better than cure. Brush your teeth well. Keep your mouth odour fresh and pleasant. Make a habit to gargle vigorously with water after eating to remove food debris. Be your own judge, look in the mirror and grin widely exposing yor upper and lower teeth, do you like what you see.? Remember that it's not a straight, well-aligned, pearly set of teeth that we aim for, ( no one is perfect i know )..we just want clean teeth. Not too much to ask right..=]

So, being the new dentist,.., here's a few things to say,..as a short dental reminder ;].

1. Consciously brush your teeth, stand in front of the mirror so u'll see what u're doing more clearly. ( instead of just running ur toothbrush aimlessly ). And no, brushing should not only take about 5 seconds,..spend more minutes to ensure tht u really manage to reach all the teeth, esp the last molars.

2. Make a system, start from right moving to the middle and left. Begin by brushing the front part and progress to the the back. Whatever way, it's up to ur style or preference in brushing ur teeth, as long as u're brushing effectively. Tht way, you wont miss a spot.

3. No, mouthwash is not a substitute to teeth-brushing. It's a complement to oral hygiene regime, but there's no exception ..u still have to brush !

4. We know tht our job includes cleaning ur teeth, by means we do scaling and give oral hygiene instructions to those who needs it. It just ... we trully appreciate if patients could at least gargle with some water before coming to see us..? ( if u could brush first, tht would be much better =] ). It helps to remove the residual chicken, kangkungs and chilli bits stuck to the teeth, and creates a more pleasing appearance as u open ur mouth in front of us..

5. If your gum bleeds when u brush, it might be a symptom of some periodontal problem. Get your teeth checked. Gum will bleeds easily when it's inflammed, which like i said earlier usually caused by plaque that's left for long around gingival margins. Take good care of oral hygiene, brush effectively ( note the word used 'effectively'..not 'frequent brushing using the wrong technique').

6. When you stand in front of the mirror, dont just marvel at what a great-fit- bod you have. Peer closer to the mirror, and examine your teeth. Is there any white, yellowish thick layers at the junction of your gum and teeth, or between teeth? It might be the long-standing plaque that stood undisturbed by your improper brushing. Or is there any brown, blackish cavities on any teeth surfaces that need filling?

7. Please, please..gargle after eating. Gargle vigorously. It helps a lot as we smtmes can't straight away reach for our toothbrush, at least some gargling will wash away the food debris and preventing it from getting stuck to our teeth for long.

8. And last but not least..bear this in mind, tht our teeth is just like any part of our body. See it as important as our fingers, toes, and our belly-button ( just naming a few ). Imagine our life without them. So..make sure to love and care about your teeth..the way you care about other body parts.

Well..people, least i can do...hehe. Still learning a lot myself. Tata..!

" cleaner teeth, fresher breath, a more confident you! "- =D

p/s : how many times i repeat the word 'clean' in here ?.. must be almost a dozen!

the storeroom

A small rectangular room, you couldn't stuff too many people in it at one time or else you'll die of oxygen shortage. It will be too saturated that you end up standing facing one another, not having a space to budge more else sit.

The storeroom, my favourite hiding place in hospital.


The place where i'll be when i dont want to be disturbed. Though it's really hard to get some peace and quiet even when you are secluding yourself in that room, as there will always be people poking their head at the door ( maybe those who seek the same reason as me ), and would go.." ops, sorry.., ingat takde org tadi ". And when i was just about to close my eyes in the comfort of silence, the cleaning lady would enter and start banging around with mops and brooms. I will patiently wait for her to finish doing whatever she's doing, and have to remind her for like every time.." kak, nanti tolong rapatkan balik pintu bila akak keluar ye..", which she usually forget and leave the door hanging open. Sighh...


A good place when you want to be alone. When there's this thing on my mind, i will head towards that small room and slowly close the door behind me, needing the time to be with myself. When im sleepy and need a few mins to doze off. When i want to read my novel peacefully or write. When i'm bored or too tired to talk with anyone, then the storeroom would be the most ideal place to sit and relax. A place where there'll be only me, staring into space.


The small room consists of two, old and unused chairs, situated facing the wall. If i outstretched my leg i believe i can reach the wall opposing it with my toes, to describe how small the room is ( or how long my leg are hehe ). There are boxes, quite a number of boxes containing stuff like the black garbage plastics, tissue papers, 'tikar', slippers etc. And wall of lockers used by the DSA's to keep their belongings, ( which also one of the reason why ppl alwys come in to the store room, killing my precious silence..). And there's this cleaning trolley , with all sorts of detergents. But what i like most about the store room is its big, glass window. The source of sunlight to the dark room, and when the clinic gets too cold, i will find warmth in the room, standing facing the glass window, drinking in the warmness of the sun while watching ppl's cars parked below. Floating into dreamland, i would imagine me driving the big cars, speeding like Angelina Jolie in 'Mr & Mrs Smith"..( fuuuh),with big 'cindy crawford' sunglasses on my nose, driving effortlessly as everyone gawked and stared at this speeding lady..hehehe..

Enough of dreaming.

Well..i guess the storeroom fulfill one need in me, the need to be with myself, the need to be alone. When the only company tht we want is ourself and the voice that we want to hear is our own. And sometimes too, when i sit on the old chair, in that small store room talking to him who is so far away from me....suddenly the room becomes the most comfortable place.

So..people, if you come looking for me and can't find me anywhere, try checking the storeroom. I might be in there.

heartbreak

Aku pernah tanya someone,.." macamana rasanya putus cinta ?.."
Dia jawab.." rasa sakit yang macam menyucuk kat hati..".

And the other day i was watching tv..there's this scene where the actor explained how he felt to be heartbroken for the first time..
" rasa sakit yang pelik yg menyerang secara tiba-tiba ..di sini" ( sambil tgn menunjuk ke arah dada )
" kadang-kadang rs sakit sehingga tak boleh tidur.."
" kadang-kadang sakit hingga rs mcm tak boleh bernafas.."

An unexpected stab of pain, that left you feeling so sad and hurt that u couldn't breath.


It must be really painful.