Monday, February 18, 2008

infidelity


I’m seething with anger …=[

Know what I despise most? Infidelity. I feel nothing but contempt to people who are disloyal to their partner. People who commit adultery. All good opinions about that person dissolve entirely. And what’s left are my enormous hate and disrespect.

Don’t know why I was so enraged after hearing it. Suddenly I feel my eyes blurring with tears, more because of anger to the heartbreakers than pity to the hurt. If the men were there, I don’t know what I’d do. All sorts of visions played in my mind, things I imagined doing to the deceiving guys, who had for months lie discreetly about their ugly affairs. The image of me slapping hard on his face. Me, staring at his eyes with disgust, and when he ask what i was staring at, I’ll reply nonchalantly “…naah, just examining a specific type of jerk ”. But what I wanted to do most was shout at the top of my lung to his face “..you stupid, ungrateful two-timer !!”.


I’ve repeated millions of time, over and over again. In my blog. To my friends. That when you have committed yourself to another person, be loyal. Be truthful. To that special someone. Especially to your own spouse whom you have bind yourself to under the name of God. If you think you are incapable of doing that, by all means refrain from getting involved seriously with any human being until you are sure that you are able to. If you don’t think you can focus your uncontrollable lust to only one person, don’t even dream of getting married yet, you’re just adding shame to your own kind. And stop using excuses like, “ we can’t help it, we have 9 akal and 1 nafsu..blabla..” Bleaahhh. Don’t cover your weakness by turning to the over-used and over-repeated defense of man-kind. Islam has guided the way. Al-Quran has showed us how. Admit your mistakes and repent.

I came across a hadith once, if I’m not mistaken, which reads something like this
(correct me if I’m wrong) “….dan apabila seseorang lelaki itu merasa berkeinginan (bernafsu) melihat seorang perempuan, baliklah ke rumah kepada isteri mereka. Kerana apa yang dicari ada pada isteri mereka…”


I’m not a female chauvinist here. In fact, almost all my idols in life are male figures. I have high admiration for a male’s calm and quiet confidence, the magnetic charisma emanated from some of them. Their ability to make snap decision, not to mention their rational perspectives about things. Which makes them great leaders. And it’s stated in the Quran, the proof of men’s importance in building a good nation. But sadly, not all of them deserve the salutation.


To my dear friends who are still nursing their broken heart, hear my word of advice. Look in the mirror. You have everything that will make any parents proud to have you as their daughter. You make any woman proud to have a person like you as their friend. And you possess all the things that will make any sensible-minded man proud to have you standing next to him as his woman. Be grateful, consider yourself lucky to be rid of such untrustworthy man. It’s not your loss, it’s the unlucky man’s loss for not realizing your worth. Look forward for tomorrow as many great, exciting things await you in front. These men, these deceitful men deserve no second chances. Instead of cursing fate, wondering silently what you did wrong that caused the change of heart, vow to yourself that you’ll bounce higher. You’ll achieve greater success in life and love. You’ll be stronger. You will attract positive people and things towards you like a magnet. And one day, the fickle-minded guy who had once ditched you for another girl will succumb to the deepest regret of his life. Serve him right!


We are far better on our own. Much more happier and successful building life without a weak, lubricious, no-good man at our feet who cause us misery, heartbreaks and wrinkles on our forehead. We deserve to be treated with respect and honesty from the one man we love most. Not cheated and lied at like some worthless door-mat. Once the trust is broken, there’s no turning back. He had that one chance, and he ruined it. Slam the door shut on his face. Let him learn his lesson so that he won’t repeat the same stupid mistake to another woman.


And for you, dear friend…the world is waiting for you to make your grand entrance. Held your head high, smile your brightest. Someone better who is worth your love is somewhere yet to be found. In the meantime, enjoy your singlehood. Do all the things you have missed doing while you were with him. Make as many friends as you can. Spread your kindness to people around you, and feel how kindness invites more kindness. I believe, as long as we have hope, we pray hard, with good intentions…good things will come to us. Trust me.


Hmm..i feel much better. =].



A phrase from Surah An- Nisa’ ayat 19,
“ Hai orang-orang yang beriman, tidak halal bagi kamu mempusakai wanita dengan jalan paksa, dan janganlah kamu menyusahkan mereka kerana hendak mengambil kembali sebahagian dari apa yang telah kamu berikan kepadanya, kecuali bila mereka telah melakukan pekerjaan keji yang nyata. Dan bergaullah dengan mereka secara patut. Kemudian bila kamu tidak menyukai mereka,(maka bersabarlah) kerana mungkin kamu tidak menyukai sesuatu, padahal Allah menjadikan padanya kebaikan yang banyak…”


And from Surah Al- Ahzaab, ayat 35,
“…Sesungguhnya lelaki dan perempuan yang muslim, lelaki dan perempuan yang mu’min, lelaki dan perempuan yang tetap dalam ketaatannya, lelaki dan perempuan yang benar, lelaki dan perempuan yang sabar, lelaki dan perempuan yang khusyuk, lelaki dan perempuan yang bersedekah, lelaki dan perempuan yang berpuasa, lelaki dan perempuan yang memelihara kehormatannya, lelaki dan perempuan yang banyak menyebut nama Allah, Allah telah menyediakan untuk mereka ampunan dan pahala yang besar….”


..and it's Allah, The Most Gracious Most Merciful, who knows best.




3 comments:

atehdear said...

sabar ye nazz..

justme said...

hheheh...
an emotional listener, can't help it ;p

Frances said...

This is why checking out a website for affairs must be the last thing which both parties should do when they've married already.